Oxxidental Jottings

Administrator Posts : 5329 Join date : 2014-09-23

davo wrote:

got this message from an internet chummy from Anglia - canna make head nor tail of it - can anyone translate?

Quote :: Ey,pal....ahyoo tekkin' t'piss,pal?
Ayup,lad....ah cannot get bowt on't site address,tha gi'us,other tha t'be telt "Y'wrong...nowt here-bugger off!" I'm teggin' t'thowt tha doesn't loovus,bonny lad!

Your translation davo....

Hello mate, are you joshing me mate?,
Your attention please ....I can't get anything on the site address you gave to me other than being told ' You are wrong there is nothing here now please go away' I am beginning to think that you do not love me mate.

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Fri Dec 16, 2016 9:10 am

Oxxidental Jottings - Page 3 Thanks3_zpsp3pukqfn

for the translation Malcolm - I reckon you were spot on......

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This post may contain controversial personal opinion, humour, ironic comment or sarcasm. If I have accidentally offended you - please contact me and I will unreservedly apologise. If however it was intentional - it will add to my pleasure. whistle

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Fri Dec 16, 2016 10:41 am

malcolm wrote:

davo wrote:

got this message from an internet chummy from Anglia - canna make head nor tail of it - can anyone translate?

Quote :: Ey,pal....ahyoo tekkin' t'piss,pal?
Ayup,lad....ah cannot get bowt on't site address,tha gi'us,other tha t'be telt "Y'wrong...nowt here-bugger off!" I'm teggin' t'thowt tha doesn't loovus,bonny lad!

Your translation davo....

Hello mate, are you joshing me mate?,
Your attention please ....I can't get anything on the site address you gave to me other than being told ' You are wrong there is nothing here now please go away' I am beginning to think that you do not love me mate.

yes I was trying to give him this site address but the forum was blocking it and accused me of spamming - how can just recommending another site be spamming - extreme case of fear in my book - fear of competition!

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Fri Dec 16, 2016 11:40 am

That's a new one on me mate, I've never come across that before batman

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Fri Dec 16, 2016 11:46 am

AlanHo wrote:: for the translation Malcolm - I reckon you were spot on......

I have been known to write the odd verse in Lancashire Dialect Alan

The Message

In a small town in Greece on th' Agean
Down theer weer t' sun shines all day
Old Sam was sittin' and scribin'
'Cos that's what 'e did for 'is pay

The sign above t' door said 'Pony Express'
It were smaller than t' Chemist's or t' Bank's
But what it didn't say was that t' pony were lame
and th' only pony were shanks'

It were one Tuesday night in September
There came a loud knockin' on t' door
And a soldier came in all drippin' wi' blood
Makin' a hell of a mess on Sam's floor

'E said 'please take this message to Athens
'Cos I'm not fit enough for the trip
But you'd better look sharp 'cos it's 26 miles
Well it's 26 miles and a bit' !

Now Sam wasn't feelin' too clever
At the prospect of runnin' that far
And 'ee'd run out of milk so 'ee couldn't make a brew
And it were early closin' at t' Spar

So 'ee scribed out a note for t' milkman
And then gettin' 'is wife out of bed
He said 'ere take this message to Athens'
And 'ee patted 'er gently on th' ead

Sam's wife set right off a runnin'
And she certainly set quite a pace
And after a while she mused with a smile
It were like runnin' a marathon race

She soon got extremely tired
And bein' fair frightened o' t' dark
She sat down in t' light of 'er torch for a while
Closed 'er eyes '- and went out like a spark !

About 3am she reached Athens
And seein' as no-one were about
She opened the note and clearin' 'er throat
The message she started to shout

'Two extra pints and six eggs if you please' !
It were wrote in a hand neat and tidy
And it went on to say that as Sam 'ad no cash
Could 'ee 'ave it on tick 'til next Friday

Realisin' she'd got the wrong message
She uttered a curse and a moan
At stupid old Sam who'd got 'er into this jam
Then she set off a-runnin' back 'ome

Meanwhile back at th'ouse old Sam (wi' no nowse)
Was snoozin' and snorin' in bed
When the milkman came round and picked-up the note
Which Sam had left out ' and it read

Agamemnon is 'oldin - off th' Persians
At Thermopolae's bridge - so come quick
And fetch 'im a sword and a shield and such-like
'Cos 'ees 'oldin 'em off wi' a stick !

Well the milkman could make moss nor sand
Of the message that 'ee 'ad just read
So stuffin' the note in 'is pocket
'Ee left 3 pints o' gold top instead !!

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Fri Dec 16, 2016 1:49 pm

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Gustav Mahler is the finest composer who ever lived.

Oxxidental Jottings - Page 3 2nkrm36

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Fri Dec 16, 2016 2:14 pm

I had an auntie who had never been on holiday until she was well into her 60s when she went in a caravan in North Wales,she lived in a small village not too far away from Newton-Le-Willows,Lancs.
The way she spoke was real "lanky" and very few people could understand her,in fact my kids would ask me to translate it for them as i was brought up with her--a very funny person sadly missed in the area. murgs dance

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Oxxidental Jottings - Page 3 1695888395

A Decent Sort Of Chap

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 6:44 am

An Aboriginal funeral and wake - it started yesterday friday on our calendar - so a packed catholic church - the church is small and most of local Aborigines were converted to catholicism - usual exhaultations but now power point presentations have become the norm plus plenty of R&R songs and Country and Westerm!

that lasted one hr and then off to the cemetery in the sweltering heat of the afternoon. fortunately they now erect beach canopies for the faint and weak hearted [that's me] - the highlight I think was a final eulogy in Worora dialect one of threein this region - both recited and sung - very inspiring. then the red earth shoveling with dust covering all the white clothed guests!

the wake started later in the 'turf club' but I declined from fraility and faint heartedness! - it finally ceased [no alcohol permitted] until 1am next morning - and now continues once again today [sat] - it's all about sharing aural knowledge and photos of the past - probably reminiscent of an Irish wake no doubt - I'm sure you could find the same in Papua New Guinea and deapest China?

I'm exhausted and I missed half of it!

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 7:01 am

It's a soporific day - 37C - no joggers about! aircon cars -aircon shops and aircon homes - nature does not understand all of this but just iss - pours down it's relentless rays relentlessly - if we all disappeared tomorrow it would just continue relentlessly. Snakes snaking away - wallabies ; hopping about ; blue tongued lizards in the shade and all just waiting for the next rains and cyclones. I met a new comer from the 'black country' today serving in WW - he said how did you know - eh lad it's ta way ta thee speaks!

he is of course newly arrived and says he loves the sunshine everyday and has heard there is a cyclone on the way - eh lad we says - theys always saiz that! murgs dance

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 8:21 am

I realise I'm being picky here but could the header of this thread be altered to the correct spelling?

It jars my brain every time I see ocassional

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 8:35 am

-pops- wrote:: I realise I'm being picky here but could the header of this thread be altered to the correct spelling?

It jars my brain every time I see ocassional

I think only the author can do that pops.

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Gustav Mahler is the finest composer who ever lived.

Oxxidental Jottings - Page 3 2nkrm36

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 1:56 pm

-pops- wrote:: I realise I'm being picky here but could the header of this thread be altered to the correct spelling?

It jars my brain every time I see ocassional

yep definitely being' picky' but I hope ya brain gets better - doesn't bother us in OZ we speaks strine! - ya an ocker! occasionally !

is there 'banning' rule for mispellings?

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 3:02 pm

Your wish is my command pops.
I'm not fond of poor spelling in topic titles and correct it when I can...but this one had passed me by.

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 3:18 pm

I yews a spellin chequer - but even that sometimes fails me

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This post may contain controversial personal opinion, humour, ironic comment or sarcasm. If I have accidentally offended you - please contact me and I will unreservedly apologise. If however it was intentional - it will add to my pleasure. whistle

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 3:41 pm

Ahhhhhhhh! Much better. My headache is going already!

Subject: Re: Oxxidental Jottings Sat Dec 17, 2016 4:02 pm

Pops - Fortunateley Malcolm is very acomodating

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This post may contain controversial personal opinion, humour, ironic comment or sarcasm. If I have accidentally offended you - please contact me and I will unreservedly apologise. If however it was intentional - it will add to my pleasure. whistle