Oxxidental Jottings

After years of experience I am sure that the males here are well versed in the topic " what turns women on - is it sex?"

well let me say sex of course can be fun - even kinky sex - but long term turn on I have found with women is NOT sex!

it is a range of other things that they enjoy men doing such as:???????????

Ironing, vaccuuming, doing the washing etc etc

Ciderman wrote:

Ironing, vaccuuming, doing the washing etc etc

good morning ciderman - what time is it over there - do we  have a time difference - I know our beer is better than yours!!

well occasionally perhaps but what does er in doors do then whilst you are doing those things may I inquire?

I find bring in flowers always does the trick - even when I've pinched them from two streets down and of course taking to a fine restaurant - like McDonalds takeaway!

xmas often seems to  increase our anxieties and fears - have we got enough food in to feed the five thousand? - is the house clean enough for us not to be criticized by family or friends for slovenliness ? - will the shops close too soon and we miss something ? will the unexpected guest arrive unexpectedly! - have we spent enough money on presents for everyone or are we being mean this year?

what should be a relax and joyful experience often becomes an anxious one - we really don't need to worry about any of those things do we??

we have two dogs normally - well there is nothing normal about them really but they are fun and keep us safe I think from things that will never happen!

we are house keeping my wifes daughters dog a small chihuahua - I usually hate small dogs but I've taken a great attachment to this one who responds to the name Ella - today which was getting excited at the glass verandah door and I absentmindedly let her out - she had seen a blue tongued lizard [adult] as large as her and went for it - if they get you in a mouth hold it is like a vice and they won't let go. but this one scurried home under the house [we have a house on small stilts] with Ella in hot pursuit - nothing I could do would prevail so either Ella died or survived - I could hear her sparing under the house but final she emerged unscathed!

Phew - any loss and I would have been blamed as the responsible adult in charge - myself I don't care if they live or die but still like them when they are alive!

I guess you are cold bloodied to - mind that the dog don't bite yer

davo wrote:

Ciderman wrote:

Ironing, vaccuuming, doing the washing etc etc

good morning ciderman - what time is it over there - do we  have a time difference - I know our beer is better than yours!!

well occasionally perhaps but what does er in doors do then whilst you are doing those things may I inquire?

8:30am here Davo. She runs the local information centre- meets all the tourists etc sells bus and ferry tickets etc.
I make my own beer and it is quite beyond the delights of the commercial chaps efforts! :-)

Ciderman wrote:

davo wrote:

Ciderman wrote:

Ironing, vaccuuming, doing the washing etc etc

good morning ciderman - what time is it over there - do we  have a time difference - I know our beer is better than yours!!

well occasionally perhaps but what does er in doors do then whilst you are doing those things may I inquire?

8:30am here Davo. She runs the local information centre- meets all the tourists etc sells bus and ferry tickets etc.
I make my own beer and it is quite beyond the delights of the commercial chaps efforts! :-)

good on ya buddy been makin me own homemade for 40 yrs - should have switched to spirits really!

got this message from an internet chummy from Anglia - canna make head nor tail of it - can anyone translate?

Quote :

Ey,pal....ahyoo tekkin' t'piss,pal?
Ayup,lad....ah cannot get bowt on't site address,tha gi'us,other tha t'be telt "Y'wrong...nowt here-bugger off!" I'm teggin' t'thowt tha doesn't loovus,bonny lad!

I  think that is still one of the great diversities of the brits - regional accents - perhaps that's why immigrants usually stay in one location - they can't keep learning a new language!

I've got a still Davo , but don't use it much now. Mostly made rum and Bourbon. Also handy for steeping plums in 85% alcohol for a couple of years.

Ciderman wrote:

I've got a still Davo , but don't use it much now. Mostly made rum and Bourbon. Also handy for steeping plums in 85% alcohol for a couple of years.

lucky B........... the laws in OZ state anyone can own a still and as long as you distillate tap water and make it better water no problems -once you get into alcohol or more specifically spirits the water gets murkier if you'll excuse a pun - all quantities produced requires an excise license and therefore a declaration to the customs and excise and duty payable which defeats the purpose. producing large quantities is very much frowned up by the heavy hand of the law.

so hush hush is the name of the game - I pay A$35 for a 750ml bottle of cheap bourbon - still refreshing but could get that down to $10 I have been told. still out here at present cost $900! have to stick to cocoa!

It was made legal here in 1995 . As long as it's not sold or traded it's ok and the quality is really very good

Ciderman wrote:

It was made legal here in 1995 . As long as it's not sold or traded it's ok and the quality is really very good

then NZ is a much more civilized country than OZ !!

Well you've got all those bitey things in the bush! Scares the crap out of us! Give us a decent earthquake any day!  

Ciderman wrote:

davo wrote:

Ciderman wrote:

Ironing, vaccuuming, doing the washing etc etc

good morning ciderman - what time is it over there - do we  have a time difference - I know our beer is better than yours!!

well occasionally perhaps but what does er in doors do then whilst you are doing those things may I inquire?

8:30am here Davo. She runs the local information centre- meets all the tourists etc sells bus and ferry tickets etc.
I make my own beer and it is quite beyond the delights of the commercial chaps efforts! :-)

I used to make beer and wine.  In fact we started a home brew shop up locally, selling beer and wine kits in concentrate form.  For the enthusiasts we also sold the basics, such as several varieties of hops, crushed pale and dark malts, various yeasts, also all the gear, fermenting bins etc.  It used to quite the thing over here, but has largely died out as a hobby now, and is a much smaller industry.  We had beer kits made specially for us with our own labels.

davo wrote:

got this message from an internet chummy from Anglia - canna make head nor tail of it - can anyone translate?

Quote :

Ey,pal....ahyoo tekkin' t'piss,pal?
Ayup,lad....ah cannot get bowt on't site address,tha gi'us,other tha t'be telt "Y'wrong...nowt here-bugger off!" I'm teggin' t'thowt tha doesn't loovus,bonny lad!

Your translation davo....

Hello mate, are you joshing me mate?,
Your attention please ....I can't get anything on the site address you gave to me other than being told ' You are wrong there is nothing here now please go away' I am beginning to think that you do not love me mate.